The Great reset
The pandemic served as a significant reset for many, prompting divergent responses. Some sought comfort and stability, while others, like myself, embraced adventure and ventured beyond their usual boundaries.
However, my experience of the COVID-19 era carried an added layer of emotional complexity. Amidst the upheaval, my wife decided to leave me after just one year of marriage.
While I refrain from comparing my journey to others, the dissolution of my marriage introduced profound emotional turmoil. Reflecting over subsequent years, I came to understand the significant role my mental health played in the breakdown of our relationship.
It's important to note that I hold no ill will towards my ex-wife; she had her reasons for her decision. Yet, the aftermath of our separation led me on a journey of self-discovery, where I confronted my mental health challenges and learned invaluable lessons about resilience, gratitude and self-care.
Running in any direction
My journey began by packing my car and heading North to Liverpool. Feeling lost and overwhelmed with a sense of failure, I sought solace in avoiding my emotions, viewing this journey North as an escape from my troubles and thoughts. Hoping to find a neutral space where I could reflect and understand myself, my goal was to gain insight into my inner workings, with the hope of addressing and rectifying my outward actions. But how I was going to do this, I honestly had no idea.
A line in the Muay Thai sand
Feeling lost is a challenging experience that often leads us to seek an escape, but running away rarely provides the solution. However, stepping outside our comfort zone can sometimes be the catalyst for discovering the tools to confront our feelings, with both courage and compassion. For me, that pivotal moment came on October 12, 2020, when I walked into my first class at Alliance Muay Thai. That day marked the beginning of my journey toward self-discovery and empowerment.
Healing the Body
At its core, Muay Thai is an intense physical discipline that engages nearly every muscle group in the body. Referred to as the "Art of Eight Limbs," every movement in Muay Thai requires strength, agility, and endurance.
Engaging in daily training sessions, not only did it improve my cardiovascular health and sculpt a body the Greeks would be proud of, but it continued to release endorphins, the body's natural mood lifters. The rhythmic motion of striking pads, bags or sparring with a partner provided me with the necessary outlet for my pent-up energy, anger and stress levels.
My new structured training regimen soon instilled new disciplines and began to foster a deeper connection with my body. By honing my techniques and practising every day, I cultivated a profound awareness of my physical capabilities and their limitations. This self-awareness laid the foundation for my self-care and commitment to improving, resulting in a clean T-total diet, and much healthier culinary habits outside of the gym.
Healing the Mind
While Muay Thai is undeniably demanding physically, its mental benefits are equally significant. Training in Muay Thai requires unwavering focus and concentration, because, you don't want a foot wrapped around your face.
In the face of physical exhaustion or adversity, you learn to push past your limits and through countless rounds of pad work, conditioning and sparring, you start to develop a mindset rooted in determination and mental fortitude.
Moreover, as you become accustomed to being hit, you develop a new perspective on fear, ultimately transforming it into a manageable force rather than an overwhelming obstacle. This transformation soon extended beyond the gym, influencing my approach to challenges and feelings outside of training too.
Beyond resilience and facing your fears, you begin to build mindfulness and emotional regulation. The meditative rhythm of training fosters a state of flow, worries and distractions fade into the background and in this heightened state of awareness, you soon let go of negative thoughts and emotions. You soon embrace a sense of inner peace and tranquillity.
Healing the Spirit
Standing at 6.3 and weighing over 200 lbs, I learned two invaluable lessons in my journey. Firstly, I discovered the significance of patience and kindness, and secondly, the lessons of humility and resilience. Despite some physical advantages, I quickly realised that true strength lies not just in power, but in compassion, openness and self-awareness.
While my stature may have allowed me to hold my own, even against opponents with superior skills, it also emphasised the importance of treating others with empathy and understanding. Partnering with those less experienced or physically weaker taught me the value of humility and the importance of supporting others on their journey.
However, there were many instances where I found myself being the nail and not the hammer, facing adversity, frustrations, and many painful shots to the liver, face and legs. These experiences served as powerful reminders of my limitations and vulnerabilities. They taught me that setbacks are an inevitable part of any journey and that embracing failure is a crucial aspect of growth.
In these moments of adversity, I learned to analyse my mistakes, understand where I went wrong, and use these insights to grow. Each setback became an opportunity for learning and self-reflection, reinforcing the notion that failure is not a setback, but rather a stepping stone towards progress.
Embracing these failures inside the gym became my guidance for letting go of my own anger, resentment and sense of regret and failure I had outside of it. Although I know healing my spirit will continue to be an ongoing process, Muay Thai continues to nurture my inner well-being.
This has allowed me to foster much more meaningful connections, not only with people inside and outside the Muay Thai community but with the person I wake up with every morning, me.
Being the healer.
One unexpected and immense benefit I discovered was the rich and diverse community within the world of Muay Thai. Over 3 years of training in more than 40 gyms, I had the privilege of encountering a vast array of individuals, each with their own unique story and reasons for donning the gloves.
This shared journey of pushing beyond our perceived limits cultivated a profound sense of empathy among us all. Witnessing the struggles of others, whether it be the physical exertion of training or the mental battles of self-doubt, fostered a deep understanding of the challenges we all face. Some days, I found myself laying the foundations for my own healing, while on others, I was adding the building blocks to support my training partners.
This shared experience of life and empathy with each other's struggles fostered a sense of camaraderie and community, unlike anything I had seen before. Individuals from all walks of life came together through shared experiences and mutual support, with bonds forged that transcended cultural, social, and linguistic barriers.
In this environment, celebrating each other's victories or losses, no matter how big or small, became second nature. We rallied around each other during difficult times, offering unwavering support and encouragement. It was a testament to the strength of the Muay Thai community and the power of empathy to uplift and unite us in pursuit of our goals.
Continuing my journey
Beyond its reputation as a combat sport, Muay Thai encompasses a holistic approach to wellness that extends far beyond the confines of a gym. Through my own journey and experiences, I've come to understand its profound healing power. In a world of chaos and uncertainty, Muay Thai and its community will continue to be my sanctuary, my beacon for reflection and my tool to overcome adversity.
This way I can continue to embrace my life with gratitude and help guide others who might experience a similar need for its healing powers.
Thank you, Muay Thai. 🙏